Granddaughter’s Love

When Eva passed away, no one in our family was surprised, but that did not mean there was no shock when she was gone. Knowing something will happen and knowing what that will feel like are two different things. As I have written before, I had thought about that day and had a list of songs Eva had given me years before. I had been scanning many of her childhood and youth pictures to share in her tribute. I wrote about how most of my plans changed during the week before her service and how God had a better plan.

Just a couple of days before the service, Jennifer told me that her daughter, Grace, wanted to sing a song during the service for her grandmother. Grace, our youngest granddaughter, was very close to Eva, but her death hit her hard. There was some concern that she would be able to get through it, and that it was a new song, and we might not be able to get the music in time for her to practice. I said yes, we would add it to the program, and if she were not able, we would just skip it. I had never heard the song or seen the lyrics before the service.

Grace was not only able to sing the song, but she also sang it from her heart. The lyrics below still move me to tears whenever I hear them, because of their significance to Grace. Grace was seventeen at that time. The song is about a granddaughter’s love for her grandmother.

Loved Me That Way
Sometimes I call you, I know I can’t reach you
To hear your voicemail, “Sorry I missed you”
Wish I could go back, tell my old self that
You don’t have the time to not make time, it goes fast

And I was livin’ like you’d live forever
And it took losin’ you to learn to love better

To be the daughter who comes home more often
Who holds on to a goodbye hug a little longer
To be the best friend, I promise to check in
And the kind of sister my brother always needed
Who takes time to call, even just to say hey
‘Cause you loved me that way

The first to show up, an hour early
Front row in the bleachers to make sure you could see me
You stood in the doorway for every goodbye
I still see you wavin’ underneath the porch light

And you were livin’ like you wouldn’t live forever
You knew the little things in life are what matter

Like makin’ those pancakes to sweeten my heartbreak
Pullin’ me out of school to go fishin’ on Thumb Lake
Had me sit beside you for Sunday service
Every time I’d get antsy, you’d slip me a Werther’s
The first to forgive all my biggest mistakes
Yeah, you loved me that way
Yeah, you loved me that way

I had the honor to be your granddaughter
I could only hope to be half of the whole that you both were
Can only hold you in a picture frame
You held nothin’ back, gave everything
You loved me that way
You loved me that way

Song by Lauren Duski