Eva – Old Habits

Last week, Jennifer and Kaylee were helping me go through some of Eva’s clothes to decide what to do with them. She had a lot of clothes, some she wore often and some just on special occasions. That process had been delayed until we could handle the moment of going through her things. A lot of memories were brought back for all of us, but we knew that would be the case. It is my hope that some families will benefit from getting some of her clothes, perhaps some young woman seeking her first job or a girl starting high school in the fall with something nice to wear.

As I was going through her 25 pairs of shoes and finding the correct box that she had kept in case they did not fit, I found some that I could remember that one time she wore them. I am not sure why I would remember that. Eva always had a difficult time finding shoes that fit her well and that she liked how they looked. I don’t think she ever had a pair of tennis shoes that did not hurt her feet due to her high arch. With her health declining, she had already given away all of her high-heel shoes a while back.

When I started pulling out her purses, I remembered some of the comments she would get when she carried the ones that have the Bible verses embroidered on them. She would change the purses with each season change along with the color of the shoes she would wear. Just something she held onto, maybe it was from not having that option when she was young. I believe our value system is shaped based on the conditions we experienced early in our lives.

When I got out the purse Eva was using last when she could still go to places like restaurants or shopping, Jennifer started pulling things out and we would comment on each of them like why she had it in her purse. Jennifer then pulled out her wallet and said, I bet I will find money tucked away in different places for emergencies. That was something she always did and told Jennifer and Tammy to also do it and not put all of it in one place. In one place she found a ten dollar folded up and another ten dollar bill stuck in another place. Then a five dollar in another place and finally a two dollar bill in the last place. For many years, Eva had used credit cards for almost all purchases and seldom carried much cash because of crime, but I guess she had a sense that she always had emergency money if she needed it. That $27 will be kept in a safe as long as I live and I would not use it even if I was starving. Some memories are too precious to just give up.